Friday, July 29, 2011

My house is empty

Bored, weepy, tired, discombobulated. Should I post something? DH says...dooo eet. It will be cathartic. I don't know. Had a hysterectomy two weeks ago. Took everything. No hormone treatment for now. Oh well. Didn't need that stuff anyway. Until I started crying. Over everything. Am healing well but still not able to go anywhere and even doing dishes wiped me out yesterday. And my dog died Wednesday. He was fine at 9 and at 11 was acting tired and died being carried into the vet's office by my son and husband. I am still looking for him. The house is too quiet w/o the jangle of his collar and now I can't tell when someone comes in the door. I hate getting out of bed because he's not there for the go outside and then do the biscuit treat trick. 4 o'clock rolls around and I stand there sniffling because the dog bowl doesn't need to be filled. I can barely stand to go out the back door because he's not there brushing past me to go outside and clicking across the deck. He's not there at my feet tangled around my computer chair and not lying watch next to my daughter's bed when I check on her. I can't even talk to people eon the phone because I cry too much. If I don't get out of this house I may go crazy but I can't drive, walk far or even put on regular clothes hardly. It's just quiet. Even with one kid blaring the radio and the other on the Wii. I miss my dog terribly.