My End of Year Inner Dialogue

Hey Ms. 100 Farmers. New School, New position, Better work environment?
"Sigh."
Don't you like it over there?
"I am honestly at a loss at how to respond."
Are you happy?
"No."
Haven't you met some great people?
"Oh yes. I've made friends with some fantastic people and dedicated educators who keep me sane some days."
So what's the deal farmer girl?
"My principal is mean."
Come on. You're a big girl now and we can't always like the people we work with, can we?
"But she's a bully and makes wildly inappropriate remarks about people."
Hmmm, does it affect you personally?
"It makes me feel dirty to be part of it."
Can you avoid these type of conversations with her?
"I'm supposed to evaluate, help, mentor and give advice. When she asks my evaluation of a situation, she will then tell that person what I have said. Her version often seems designed to make her look like the good guy." "It makes me ineffective."
Sounds like you don't trust her?
"I feel like I can't come to her with issues like I'm supposed to without her disabling the mentoring relations I have established to help other people."
Do you think you're doing a good job over there?
"I work my tail off but feel like I'm spinning my wheels. I don't have faith in her as a principal and I hate coming to school."
That's pretty harsh. Is it as bad as last year?
"In my heart and gut it feels that way."
What are you going to do about it?
"Sigh........." and my inner voice goes quiet